A Dew and a smile

Jana and I drove to Gunnison today (who knew where Gunnison was) and there out in the middle of a vast field was Cord's new house. After wending our way trying to find 255 E 300 S, (like we couldn't SEE the huge complex...it is sprawled everywhere, including the coiled barbed wire fence and huge towers and lights surrounding the whole thing) we showed our ID at the gate of the Central Utah Correctional Facility. The officer asked if we had any weapons or contraband of any sort...(um ya sure... it's all in the trunk?) , checked to see if we were on McCord's visitor's list and then opened the gate for us. It was like a railroad crossing gate where only one long arm lifted up and we had to manuever our way through. We drove past the daunting wall (did I mention the barbed wire coiled on the fence above and to the right of us and actually everywhere we looked?) and parked in the "visitors" section. We made sure we didn't have gum in our mouths, (inmates and visitors put gum anywhere/everywhere; no purses, cell phones, no underwire bras,(they beep through security, thus they don't know if you have a bra or a gun) no scanty clothing...only my car key, a baggy full of quarters and our ID.

Our hearts were full, our nerves were on edge... anticipating seeing McCord and actually being able to hug and kiss him. As we entered the facility doors, we were walked to the front desk where we had to show our IDs once again. We told the man sitting there (reading a novel) that this was our first time visiting. He said he was the Nice one they put at the front desk...the others in the back were the onery ones. Oh, a wise guy eh? It did help our blood pressure to go down a bit. He told us we could take our quarters in but he didn't know what my car key was....and told me I had to put it in a locker...so after getting a token from him and instructions on how NOT to look like a moron, I figured the little locker out and put my key inside successfully. He told me most people can't do it the first time and actually made a joke about those kind of people. Whew...i felt like I had passed my driver's test again!

After getting the low down on the "rules" once we actually see McCord, such as no PDA or excessive touching or kissing..(i reminded the officer that I WAS his mother and Jana WAS his sister.....)
I proceeded first through the security door and I BUZZED!!! OF course, I had shanks in my shoes! Why didn't I remember putting them there? So, I had to try again, this time barefoot and my shoes had to go through an x-ray machine. I walked through again successfully and then Jana came through without a problem...

We walked down a corridor...I mean a long long long upslanting wide extra wide corridor.....and at the top was a door that we had to wait for the lady inside to stop playing her x box game so she could look at our ID's again and then buzz us through....those doors where they slide open and then slam clang LOCKDOWN behind you...reverberating into your very guts...then you had to proceed 20 feet and have the next set of doors repeat the same action and sounds...sliding open and then booming foreboding LOCKDOWN sounds. (I shoulda had a xanex)..... Then we walked to a desk with an official looking officer standing around and showed our ID once again as he decided which table to assign us to. Lucky number three...
Then he buzzed the door open and we repeated the same steps as before as we walked through and then the door slammed behind us and we were IN!!!!

We found table number 3 that we were assigned to sit. We didn't know if we were allowed to look around us....but after a moment realized that people were not interested in us at all; they just wanted to spend the time with their loved one. Surprisingly, there were mostly young inmates with "older" women holding onto them etc....

The room looked like a huge cafeteria with maybe about 20 tables scattered around. Another glassed in room was where the people with children could go and not bother the other visitors. On a farther wall there was vending machines where you can purchase canned and bottled drinks and other items such as chips, candies etc.

We waited and waited for McCord to come. It seemed an eternity yet it was only about 10 minutes when we saw his familiar bald head and handsome mass coming towards us. The huge guard on his side of the glassed room frisked him and then buzzed him through the heavy door and then we were up and hugging him. It was a special moment for both Jana and I. (We didn't know until later, that he gets "stripped searched" every time he has to go back through his door.)

We realize that Cord doesn't show much emotion...never has..never will? So we were hoping for a more joyous welcome...but we didn't know if it wasn't "cool" for him to hug us and express some kind of jubilation that he had visitors! I guess I didn't know what to expect from him...we haven't been able to see him without restraints or through a glass window for months...

McCord said he was outside playing baseball and was surprised that his name was called. He was not expecting anyone to visit him until Monday, so he said it was great to see us. (this, after prodding him with questions such as : Were you surprised to see us? Were you glad we came?)

Two hours have never flown by so fast. Jana didn't dare walk to the machines to get McCord a drink as she was uncomfortable walking in front of the inmates, so Cord went and got himself a diet Moutain Dew. He pushed the wrong button on the first try and a non-diet mt. dew came out. I said, "Why aren't you drinking that one?" and he replied, " Do you want to die from obesity or cancer as the regular one has 45 grams of sugar and the diet one has apartame?" Always the funny boy....

It was good to catch up on news--to hear about his life inside and laugh and cry with him. (well, Jana and I cried..his eyes did well up several times....progress).

He is feeling stressed at being in the HOPE program. He has a week grace period where he has to learn ALL the rules, before he starts "snitching" on the other men in the rehab. He seemed to be bummed to have to leave Rooster and the comforts he had found there and has some wierd stories already to tell..when he writes again. He said that he has to write in a journal as part of his therapy, so he will only be writing longer, more informative letters from now on and not sending out his journal pages. We do pray he can learn in this rehab. He said they told him he would have to be there for a year, so we hope he learns his lessons well and can get on with his life without the use of drugs when he finally gets out. We hope he especially learns how to NEVER end up there again, as he said there are so many that return time and time again.....